Tag: computer

(Lines_of_Code) / (Hours_of_Sleep) < (Number_of_Energy_Drinks_Consumed) Every time you look at your clock, you see a power of 2 (6:40, 1:28, 2:56, 5:12, 10:24) You’re pressing CTRL+S every 5 minutes, in every application.. You end each line you type with “;”, even plain english ones; You code your own support software for the digital camera you just bought When your significant other mentions having kids you lecture her on the disadvantages of multiple inheritance. MSVC opens on startup. Whenever somebody asks you to do something, you try to think of a way to write a program that would help you. You have 2 bookshelves filled with programming books in your room… because the 5 shelves in the living room are full. You know the following sequence by heart: 1 2 4 8 16 32 64 128 256 512 1024 2048 4096 8192 16384 32768 65536 131072 You read The Tao of Programming…and relate. You need an intercom for downstairs to tell your parents / girlfriend / wife / whatever to get you more JOLT. When you take a break from programming, and program. When you can say with a great level of confidance that you have written more lines of code than english. You wake up in the middle of the night with the solution to your coding problem. Your 4 year old son has seen you login and out of Windows and Linux so much that he can do it himself. You are the only one who knows what the difference is between a coder and a programmer. You have more groceries inside your keyboard than in your fridge. You have a toothbrush next to your monitor. You watch a tv sitcom and think “I could write an algorithm that writes the scripts for these things” You sit stuck at traffic lights and work out a more efficient algorithm for them, based on road orientation, sensor placement, time of year, time of day, weather and local sporting events, in your head. The people you respect most you have never physically seen or spoken to, but you always bow to their knowledge. Your family informs you than you should go and make some more friends …so you start coding AI routines. You consider ‘drinking caffeine’ and ‘sleeping’ to be synonyms. You can write ‘Pong’ in any language for any OS (or even NO OS) in under 4 minutes. You get drunkhighotherwise intoxicated just for a different coding experience. You think of sex as an algorithm. Sunshine genuinely hurts your eyes. You actually feel like crap from getting 8 hours of sleep, that just so unnatural You can’t help but squeeze math and research topics in while sweet-talking to a girl. You have a “hacker’s manicure” (i.e. huge calluses on all your fingers) When you die you want “Hello world” carved into your headstone You keep old computers around and boot them up every once in awhile for the nostalgia. You would like to have an Aibo to see if you can run Linux on it. Your mother phoned you to see if you were still alive, and you responded “ping”. You look at your old code and cringe You got a D in Computer Programming class because you where coding a plasma effect instead of a “Hello World!” program You read books on quantum physics and time-travel to relax. When someone asks you your favorite color, you give the RGB code in binary. No one else can ever use your computer, as it is tweaked so much only you know how to use it. The first time you use another person’s computer it takes you less than 30 seconds to completely disable all useless programs from running at boot and uninstalling all the ad-ware the fools had on the system. You actually get these jokes and pass them on to other friends who are addicted to coding.